Sports at Christmas Time Can Hurt Family Connections

    The holiday season is supposed to be a time of joy, love and family closeness, but that is not always the case as many of us realize. Families at this time of year can be a blessing and a curse. It is a time of getting together, eating, drinking and being merry. But it can also be a time where togetherness brings up resentments and past hurts. And then add sports into the mix – they can be a cause for celebration, but also a way to avoid communication, maintain emotional distance, and reduce opportunities for love and openness.
   
    Sports are a part of the daily world. I should know – I am a sport psychologist. I do sports for a living. At this time, however, I am left with the question of how sports can be a detriment for families during the holidays. Professional sports are on television during the two "big" days of this holiday season. Many times, instead of talking and sharing with people you have not seen or just spending quality time with people you see regularly, the world of sports takes center stage on the 55 inch flat panel television. Even youth athletics get into the picture with many parents traveling to their child's sporting events on Christmas Day.
   
    Can we give sports a break for even one day? Maybe your family truly enjoys sports during these times and is healthier in functioning, but for numerous people, televised sports is a barrier to healthy family connection and communication (television creates this same block every single day of the year for families, but when is there a good time to communicate and connect if not during this time of year?). I myself will be with family during this time of year and sports will be on the television, but it will be in the background and not center stage. This needs to be a time of connection, not disconnection. I am not suggesting having family therapy, just spending time truly together. I know this can be difficult as television helps to avoid the "pink elephant in the room," but think about connecting – it is closeness with others that is continuously the number one thing that makes people happiest – not money, fame, power or sports.

Sports and Christmas – To Consider

1. Use this time to connect with family, not avoid or block. Sports are easy distractions, but they are on television every single day of the year. Think about giving them a break altogether.

2. Plan games and activities where eye contact and communication are more likely. It may be best to even turn off the television all together.

3. Balance – it is okay to watch sports during these days, but keep your time in check – balance your sports watching with CLOSE human interaction.

4. Step out of your comfort zone – connecting with family can be challenging, but anything valuable usually requires some hard work.

5. Reward – making a positive emotional connection with someone is far more rewarding that any sporting event could ever be.